Leo Love

I haven't seen my horse friend since November.  Well not my friend that owns the horses, but the actual horses themselves...actually come to think of it I haven't seen either since November.  I was excited about going to see him this morning.  When I walked in the gate, he looked up, quit eating and walked towards me.  It made my day.  I don't know if he remembered me or was just curious.  Either way it was like he dropped everything for me and it made my heart feel so good.  He feels so soft and looks like he has gotten bigger since I saw him last.  While petting him and walking around with him and talking to him and telling him how much I missed him, a sweet little cat appeared.  I tell you - the peace I find and the hope I feel with Leo is amazing.

A busy week

This week proved to be a bit of a roller coaster ride....one where we all wanted to get off, but somebody more in charge than we are, kept us on a little longer.  Sometimes we think we can't take anymore and God shows us just how much more we can handle.  Mental illness is just that - a sickness affecting the mind.  It tends to creep in at the worst time, well really no time is ever 'good' for it.  My family has been walking this difficult road and while we have much to rejoice about, the challenges and setbacks can be very discouraging. This week it seemed like my dad was losing his fighter spirit.  I noticed that it was more difficult for him to talk and then he seemed really discouraged.  I think progress comes in waves and sometimes, just like when a child masters something new they regress in another area, so I think its similar when you are talking about brain trauma. He seems to have bounced back though, and we finished the week up strong! 

I don't accept anything less than the best from my dad, as he always expected the same from me.  Just as he knew, as a parent - when I wasn't trying my best....so I have learned, over time - when he isn't trying his best.  This week he wanted to lay in bed and he was not really wanting to keep fighting and keep pushing forward.  I stood beside his bed and would tell him that I wasn't leaving until he got up. My mom and brother and sister also had to do this, the evenings were even more difficult than the days  I reminded him that I had the best teacher when it came to learning about being stubborn.  Eventually he would get up, and I know, being one who struggles myself - sometimes 'just' getting out of bed is a big accomplishment.  I am glad that my dad and I have a good connection and we can read each other.

We spent time on his speech homework.  He has to say the word and match it to the picture.  He was able to read most of the words.  Matching the word with the picture was a little more difficult for him and even though it seemed like it made him a little sad sometimes that he couldn't make the match, he still pushed on.  The fact that he could read the words is huge progress, when he was at Brooks he was not able to read any words.  

Here is a video just to give you an idea of how much concentration goes into this task.

I didn't like to do too much speech work, with out a break.  It can be a bit discouraging for him.  In between work sheets we would stop and stand up and toss bean bags into a bucket - they are shapes and colors - so really speech continued just in a different way.  Other times we would take a break and do arm exercises.  It is amazing to put his arm on the arm skate we made him and see how much more he can move it on his own.   At one point during a 'break' he and my brother were arm wrestling!  I love the look on both of their faces - true personality! 

 The following pictures were taken almost one month apart - oh the difference your skull makes! And you can see how much more the muscles in the right side of his face are coming back!

We spent some time looking through photo albums.  We talked about the memories the picture represented. Just before this we were talking about birthdays.  It is interesting how my dad goes through the thinking process, sometimes out loud, to arrive at his answer.  We would ask him, "when is Vaughn's birthday" and he would say all the months and stop at November and then he would start at 1 and count until he got the right date.  He was saying all this though!  It is pretty neat to hear his thought process. He seemed to enjoy looking at the photo albums.  I would ask him point people out or just ask him who he was looking at, so he could point to the person and/or say who they were.  The week ended up on a much better note than it began.  I can't even begin to imagine how hard this is for him to live through.  Being a man that liked to be in control of situations and always be going and doing for others; I can't imagine how upsetting this is to him, that his independence has been greatly lessened. I see the impact that it has had on each of us who have been with him day in and day out - but we still can't really grasp it from his perspective. 

This afternoon we went for a walk.  Last night I was browsing the world wide web, and was reading the Brooks News section and saw something called a challenge mile. "The Challenge Mile is not meant to be a competitive race, but rather a way for people of all ages and abilities to celebrate their personal accomplishments." My dad, my family - we certainly have a lot of accomplishments to celebrate.  The date is March 12th and we are registered!  I can't wait!  By the time we participate in this even it will have been just about 4 months since my dad had his stroke.  My mom was telling me that today she was looking at statistics.  She said that 50% of people who have an ischemic stroke never walk again.  She told us this as we were just about back to our house, and had just finished almost a 2 mile walk!  

Rain, rain....

Rain, rain go away, come again another day....

I am not a fan of the rain, especially when it is constant.  It has rained all day today.  No sun.  Just dark, pouring rain...all.day.long...  I suppose that in this storm the plants and flowers and trees rejoice. A new meaning to "praise you in this storm." The way I view this storm, might not be how somebody else views it. I guess you could think that way about the storms of life too. This picture I took this morning just really resonated with my soul. The calm before the storm.  The ability to stand in light but feel the darkness encroaching all around.  The one lone little bird.  So many other birds on the beach, so many other people in this world and yet I stand alone.  I mean the bird stands alone.  This could also be the light returning after the storm. I need the Son to return again.  I don't do well with all the darkness in this world. 

Behind the scenes....

It has been a while since I blogged. Dad's progress since his skull piece was replaced has continued, as many said that it would. Unfortunately my dad thinks he should be further along than what he is.  You know how sometimes we don't see the progress we have made but other people can?  We see how much he is doing and has done and yet he thinks its just too hard and he should be further along. Yesterday he seemed a little discouraged and I got him up and we went for a walk.  He didn't seem like himself.  Last night was rough.  He is losing the fighter spirit.  That can't happen!  He made it through the night, thanks to my incredible mom.  You know I sit back and think sometimes (well all the time really) and I reflect on just everything.  I can honestly say that when I think back to him going in for the surgery on November 21st  and the days that followed, and the many doctors in and out, mom kinda gave us no option but to believe the best.  She is the one who would correct the doctors and when they would say, 'if his right side comes back it might take a year' and she would follow up their 'if' with 'when'.  She would go in the little meeting room to talk with the doctor after surgeries, by herself.  I'm not sure if that was on purpose or just how it worked out.  Even though we are all adult children, its like she was shielding us from as much pain as she could.  I guess that's just a mothers love.  Somewhere in the mix of my thinking though, I started wondering, who is shielding her from the hurt?  Everything is raw and most of the doctors have definitely given her the worst case scenario.  As hard as it has been on all of us, I can't even begin grasp the magnitude of the impact this has had on her.  She gets up every day and goes to work.  She keeps pushing.  She keeps believing. She keeps encouraging my dad.  

Anyways - yesterday was a walk and my sister also had him making faces while looking at the phone.  Believe it or not that is part of speech therapy. Making the faces and the sounds with the lips will help bring back the muscle in his face.  So the next time you make a silly face for a picture - just know that for some people that takes great concentration.  

Today I went to pick up my dad around 9:15.  I told him we would go see Uncle Jay today and when I got there and got in the door he looked at me and said, "I'm ready."  I have to say, we must have some miracle blood that runs in our family or something....my uncle was in a car accident on October 23, it was bad.  He was in taking to Shands trauma with two collapsed lungs, shattered ribs, broken shoulder and leg. Fevers, infections, cardiac arrest. He spent a good while in the ICU and is still in the hospital, in a transitional care unit. There were many times that my dad would call me in tears because he didn't know if his brother would pull through.  None of us knew.  Somehow he did, and he will tell you, well he told me today that God has a plan for him and my dad and that for some reason he is still around.  He was encouraging to my dad.  Its beyond me to think that back in November we didn't know if either one of these guys would make it through.  Yet today they were encouraging each other.  My uncle is so proud of my dad and when his buddies would come say hi to him in rehab he would always introduce my dad.  It was sweet to see.  They understand each other so well. 

On our way back from Shands he got his next 'assignment' for the day - here is a grocery list - lets go shopping!  I needed a few things from Walmart.  While we were there I got him to push the cart, mostly he did this with his left arm but I had him put his right hand on the handle to get a feel for it.  He had to find the milk and the cheese and the peanut butter and the broccoli....what a combination?!  I told him his reward was a bag of chips and some dip!  I have been told that he will do things for me that he won't do for others.  I will that out to his advantage....and help him progress on this journey. When it was time to check out, I had him find the barcode and scan the items and place them in the bag.  EVERYTHING is a a re-learning experience for him.  I enjoyed the time we had together.  When we came home, he had a little snack and rested for a bit before having lunch.  In the afternoon we worked on matching letters and saying what each letter is.  We also walked outside and enjoyed the warm weather.

I have included a video to give of his latest achievement.   

 I close this blog tonight, asking you all to really lift him and my family in prayer.  I try to highlight all that we do in a day when I do blog, and I try to show his improvements and what he is doing and keep it positive.  But in reality, every day is challenging.  Today the brakes on the truck sounded funny, the truck needs some work and is no longer safe to drive. This is one of those little reality checks for me.  If none of this had happened, we could easily go to him and ask what was wrong.  He could tell us and fix it and we would be on with our day.  But who do you trust with getting work done on your vehicle when he has always been the one to do it?  It feels like a slap in the face - your dad had a stroke - he is not currently able to diagnose nor fix the problem.  It doesn't make me sad that he can't fix it right now, it makes me sad to think about how much life has changed. My dad seemed really discouraged all day, he gets this certain look in his eyes and kinda just stares. We try to keep him busy when he is feeling like that but sometimes he just flat out refuses to do anything.  It takes my mom encouraging him and sometimes just pleading with him to keep trying.  Tonight was rough.  He is struggling.  He is frustrated.  He is sad.  He is discouraged.  He doesn't want to keep going like this. As strange as it seems he and I are oddly connected.  I face my own struggles, just like the next person.  Somehow we can both be struggling, not know it and find out later that we were both having the same thoughts and feelings at almost the same exact time.  There is always more than what meets the eye.  There is a lot that goes on behind the scenes.  Be gentle with those you meet and be gentle with the words you use.  And most importantly N-E-V-E-R walk out on somebody.  Even if you can't relate or fully grasp the extent of their pain, the worst thing you can do is say nothing or back away.  I love my dad so much.  I love my mom so much.  They are both fighters. 

Can't keep a good man down....

Yesterday my dad got his skull piece back!  A few hours, some titanium, and a skilled doctor and his skull is all one piece again!  We sat in a different waiting room, with a lot more people.  We weren't considered ICU this time!  The doctor kept telling my mom that he stayed remarkably stable through surgery. When I went to see him this morning my mom told me that the doctor who saw him shortly after surgery had come by to see him.  He wasn't required to, he was "just curious."  I will let my mom tell it, "A doctor who saw him after the stroke came in to see him this morning. He was "just curious." I asked what do you mean curious? Well I remember your family and how bad the stroke was and I was afraid when you and the kids realized he would never be the same it would be very difficult for you all to handle but then Dr. B told me he was doing Vaughn's cranioplasty and that I would be surprised, so here I am. So he asked Vaughn a lot of questions and asked him to move his legs, move his arms, wiggle his toes and then some more questions. All of Vaughn's answers were appropriate. He shook his head, sighed and said, "I would have never expected him to do this well....and its only 2 months post event....wow...I wonder how it is he's done so well?" I smiled and before I could say anything Vaughn said, "God's got a plan for me." 

Before my dad could leave the hospital today he had to be cleared by the doctor and different therapists. When the physical therapist came in she asked if he needed assistance to walk, I told her no, she said are you sure, does somebody walk with him when he walks, I told her no.  She said she had read over his file and again asked if I was around him much and if he could really walk on his own.  They got him up and did some balance tests and then they took him for a walk.  Now let me back track a minute.  When he left Mayo on December 8th to head to Brooks, he could barely stand on his own.  50 days ago. He was in room 510 last time, this time he was in room 514.  We saw many of the same nurses he had right after all this happened.  It was quite a sight to see how encouraged they were by seeing my dad, remembering where he was and remembering our family and they all just stood in amazement when they saw him walking around the hall. I'm sorry this picture is a bit blurry....it was due to a combination of trying to keep up with him- he was ready to be walking so he could be home - and just the joy and the overwhelming magnitude of realizing that 50 days ago, the last time we walked down these halls, he wasn't walking with us. 

From an inside, outsider (I've been there with my mom and dad every step of the way but yet I haven't been the one to recover from a stroke)....it is pretty neat to see how God isn't wasting this pain my mom and my dad and my family have had to endure.  Seeing how these doctors and nurses have responded to my dad is like God showing us all how he is using this, this stroke, for His glory. 

Oh, and I almost forgot - check out what we were able to get on video today - his fingers are working!  They say the hand is the last thing to come back after a stroke because of how much brain is used in moving the hand....so this is like the toe video of him barely moving the toes, but then eventually walking....so here is him moving those fingers!  

 "God's got a plan." I love my dad so much. 

Lost.

Have you ever experienced an overwhelming feeling?  You know the kind that take your breathe away and leave your heart racing?  Or the kind that drench you in sweat and awaken you from a deep sleep?  What about those moments that you are overwhelmed by joy and simply left speechless?  Grappling with words to try and adequately express something that words simply can not define? When no combination of letters and sounds can convey what is on your heart? 

Here lately there is a common thought that seems to be running through my mind. I have not been able to get it to leave my thoughts.  Ironically it has also shown up in a book that I am reading and in the movie that I watched yesterday with my husband. 

The lost.

Maybe its feeling lost.  

Maybe its being lost.  

Maybe its trying to reconnect with the lost.  

Maybe its about remembering the lost.

Maybe its about finding the lost.

Maybe its about never giving up on the lost.

My husband and I read together every morning and every night.  In the morning, we independently read the bible, usually during the same time.  At night, after the boys are in bed we read a book together.  We take turns reading aloud half a chapter or a few pages (depending on how deep the content of the book is).  It is a nice way to connect and discuss and its always neat when somehow whatever we are reading in the bible overlaps or adds to what we are reading in the evening together.  We are currently reading The Comeback by Louie Giglio.  I have to say that prior to this book coming in the mail we had started another one and it was a combination of stories of, "underdogs, misfits and the art of battling giants."  It didn't keep our interest and was hard to get into, so when The Comeback arrived, we were eager to start that one.  And guess what?!?  Its a book about others and their comebacks....So perhaps, for right now - the message we need to hear is about the comebacks that other people have experienced.  I suppose it is renewing our hope?!?!?

Last night we read about the frustration of feeling locked out when it comes to the church. He was talking about the image that some churches put forth, coming across as "high and mighty" or religious, using different language and indirectly coming off as closed off to others. He talked about exclusion that takes place in some churches.  Sending the message that you are in or out, you've done it right or done it wrong.  He brings us to Luke chapter 15. He reminds us that we are to welcome those who are, "failing and flailing." I love one line in particular when the people became confused by the fact that when Jesus appeared, he did things they didn't think he would -  he welcomed the sinners. In some strange amount of irony, sinners were getting closer to Jesus while the religious people were backing away from him.  

 Louie dives into Luke 15 a little deeper and talks about how Jesus responded to these 'religious people.' I can honestly say I have heard this story quite a few times.  Even people who are not familiar with the bible, when they hear, "the parable of the lost sheep," they know the basics - a shepherd goes off to find the one lost sheep, even if that means leaving the other 99.  He carries it on his shoulders and rejoices because he is safely back.  Another parable in the same chapter talks about the hunt for the missing coin and the rejoicing that happens when it is found.  And the other common parable in Luke chapter 15 is that of the lost son and once again, rejoicing when he comes home.  In each parable, they didn't give up on what or who was lost.  Sometimes to the extent of putting things on hold.  An example was provided for the lost sheep parable - "Let's take any gathering where there are supposed to be, say, 2000 people.  If 1 percent of the crowd doesn't show up, just 20 people, God would say to the other 1,980 in the room, "Hold on," and he would go after the lost ones. After he found them, he'd say to them, "I know I have a whole room full of people, but I want you in the story too.  You see, I know your name, and you matter to me."

This left me with the question, is that how we treat the people who are in our life? Do you notice when somebody isn't there?  Do you tell the others, 'hold on I need to go find___.' Or do you just move on? Sometimes I feel forgotten. I feel lost. I feel like my presence does not matter.  I don't think this is how God wants us to feel.  I think our society has become so absorbed with "knowing" what is going on in somebody elses life that sometimes we fail to stop and talk to the person.  We read a status update on facebook, we follow somebodies blog detailing their struggles, we tweet and pin and share - but somehow remain lost.  This has to change. 

The Lost.

The lost sheep.

The lost coin.

The lost son. 

Luke 15

The Lost. The found. The rejoicing.

This concept has been close to my heart for some time, and for once I feel like it is not an unrealistic expectation.  But rather I feel that this is the way it should be! I think we should notice when somebody is missing but not stop there.  We need to reach out to others when they are not present because the struggles they face may be huge, and they may be just one person, and it may mean leaving a crowd behind to reach them --- but the message you share by your actions when you do that --- changes them forever.  It tells them they are important and their life matters.

So that was how the book tied into my thoughts of feeling lost and then my husband and I were watching one of Robin Williams earlier movies, titled Awakenings and it was sad and hopeful, an inside look of a mental institution and the people who ran it and the struggles these patients faced.  Many of them appearing to be "lost" but still alive.  One doctor comes in and tries a new medication, and for the chemical window that it worked, these people (many of whom were in a catatonic state) came back and shared how they were taking in everything that was happening.  While this is a movie, it was very touching.  Perhaps it was some of the final words shared by Robin Williams that stood out to me the most and somehow ties together this idea of being lost and looking out for others.

"The human spirit is more powerful than any drug and that is what needs to be nourished.  we have forgotten the simplest things."  Robin Williams Awakening

Look around.  Think about the people in your life.  Think about the people who have crossed your path.  Did some fade away because of life - new job, moving to a different state, etc.? Some lost to the expiration of life? Are there any people who just quit showing up and you don't know why?  Be grateful for those people who check on your, who notice when you aren't present, who reach out to let you know they noticed.  Be grateful for those people who grab your hand and hold on no matter what.  Life is short.  We are not guaranteed tomorrow. Everything can change in an instant. Let others know that you notice them, that they matter, that they are important. 

Memories...

It has been a few days or so since I really wrote much on the blog.  I feel like we are all still trying to get into a routine and just about the time we find it, well it will change!  My dad has been working hard.  I was able to go with him to therapy yesterday afternoon.  The timing of his appointments has not worked for me to go with him prior to yesterday.  They started by strapping his right hand onto the bike that he pedals with his hands type device....he had such a look of pride and accomplishment, like he was showing off what he could do while I was there.  I loved seeing him proud of himself.  Strokes affect so much.  And as much as I try to give a lot of details about our day to day life and what we do to re learn and re teach and help dad, there are many details that get left out.  I try to remain positive.  He still has his rough moments, but a certain part of that is just life. It is hard to see him get frustrated when he is trying to tell us something and can't find the words to verbalize it.  You can tell by the look on his face that he knows what he wants to say, he just can't figure out how to get it out.  This has made us all a little more in tune with each other and also with him.  We have to really pay close attention to what he says, what we are doing when he tries to talk to us, what hand motions he might be showing us, all to try and figure out what he needs or what he wants us to know.  It is a labor of love that none of us thinks twice about, but it isn't an easy road to walk.  Anyways, after the bike pedal thing then they put his arm in an air cast and strapped his hand to a bar and had him lifting the bar.  They did some other exercises with his arm while it was in the air cast.  One big thing that he has to work on is continuing to breathe while he is trying to move his arm.  The occupational therapist said, "the last thing we want is you learning how to move your arm but holding your breathe every time you move it."  He gets to concentrating so hard on moving that right arm that he forget to breathe and has to be reminded to take a deep breath.  We found that if he says push or pull or whatever they are trying to do while it is in the air cast, him saying the word as he does it then forces him to breathe while doing the activity.  Every single day I am reminded of how much we do all at the same time without so much as a second thought.  I mean do you breathe while you lift your arm?  Can you imagine having to tell yourself to breathe when you do something so simple as lifting your arm?

Earlier in the day my grandma had come to visit with him and while I had walked my sister and brother out and talked with them before they left for school, the phone rang and my grandma in an attempt to find paper to take a message, found a coloring book and used the back page.  Well my dad didn't like that so we found paper and I had him copy the phone number and name of the person who called.  We set that paper aside and then I opened up the coloring book and asked him if he wanted to color...he told me no but I told him we had to do something and couldn't walk outside because it was so cold.  So we found a page and we colored.  He did the entire picture.  It took a lot of concentration.  He is not left handed and looking at this picture, I was impressed that it was so neat!  It took almost two hours to complete this picture.  We did take a few breaks in between to stand up and stretch and to put the dishes away. Coloring isn't just coloring though.  I had his right arm and hand on the table, as if it were holding the paper as he colored with his left hand.  This involved putting my arm under his to hold it up and also hold the paper, because even though his hand was positioned as if he was doing it, he isn't quite there yet.  I was so proud of him for sticking with it.  For the final circle he told me he just couldn't finish it, I told him he had no choice!  It was a lot for him to focus on and stay in the lines and pick the colors, but once it was done it gave him a sense of completion and something tangible to look back on that he did!  Sometimes he doesn't always remember what we do in a day.

 I told him yesterday that I would take him to see Uncle Jay today.  He was happy about that.  This morning I got back to the house around 9:15 and asked him if he was ready to go, "oh yes." He got his shoes on and his jacket on and we were out the door in about 15 minutes.  When we got to Shands we found that his brother had been moved to a different room.  When the nurse started telling me where that room was, at first I got a little nervous because while my dad can walk, I am not sure about his stamina and we have been warned that his leg is still weak. Our walk to his new room also included a ramp.  I kept asking him if he wanted to take a break and he said very clearly, "no!"  Once we got to his new room then we were told he was in the gym for his therapy so it was more walking.  The good news is my dad got a lot of physical therapy in today!  It was kind of neat to see my dad sitting beside my uncle while he was in therapy, it was like my dad was on the other end of it.  Usually people are with him in therapy and today he got to be with his brother!  I listened to my uncle encourage my dad and tell him about improvements he saw in him from last week to this week and just telling him that God has a plan and that everything is going to be ok.  It was nice to see him be so encouraging to my dad. He was even telling the other people in the gym that I wanted to be a physical therapy assistant and thus began a conversation about physical therapy and occupational therapy with the person who was working with my uncle. My uncle seems like a different person now, it is hard to explain and there are no words for it, but it is nice to see.  He and my dad both have fought back and defied the odds in their situation. It is inspiring and also makes me stop and think that some of that fighter blood is in me too!  My uncle was telling my dad how he is a good man and he raised good kids and has a good wife because we are all helping my dad through this.  He told my dad that what we are all learning by helping him, is that we are strong too! I enjoyed reading the ceiling tiles as we got ourselves all mixed up with where we were going....I found my heart for today!

 After leaving Shands we went to the bread store and then headed for home.  On the way home my dad said, "Rachel's house."  and then started shaking his head and pointing is finger towards the left and saying "go back."  I couldn't figure out what he was trying to say I thought maybe he wanted to go back to see his brother at Shands.  Eventually we worked together and figured out that he wanted me to park at my house and he would walk back home.  He told me to go inside.  I had to figure out how to let him walk home, but not really.  I didn't know if he would stop to look for cars before crossing the street or what if he tripped and fell as he crossed the street and then somebody didn't see him in the road and hit him or what if he got tired and tried to push it.....yeah...he isn't ready to walk home alone yet - even if that is only 400 feet away.  I told him I had to take Vaughn to class so I would walk back with him.  He agreed, and I was grateful!  I know he strives to be as independent as he can, but its hard when it comes to protecting him in the process. We got home and he put the dishes away and then my grandpa came.  They hung out and had lunch and watched a movie and did some arm exercises and then my dad walked the front yard while my grandpa trimmed the trees. I went to get Ivan and when I came back my dad had just laid down for a little rest so we put a puzzle together and then pop headed for home!

When he left I went in and told dad that his nap time was over and it was time to get up and do something else.  I asked him if he wanted to sit on the porch and watch Ivan play.  When the sun came out it felt really nice. Ivan had taken a penny outside and decided to use that penny to play basketball....after a few penny's got stuck on the roof my dad walked down the ramp and said, "I'll get the ball, throw it, you throw it back."  I agreed and said we would have to go in the shed and find the basketball.  He went right to it!  Once outside, with his old familiar basketball in his hand, he was determined to make the shot!  I didn't take too many pictures as I felt like I needed to stand guard and make sure the basketball didn't hit the rim and bounce back and hit his head.  He was so into it thought.  The look of concentration and how he would steady himself and aim....I told him he could not chase after the ball, he had to stand and not try to run the ball down.  He still has it though!  Even though he is shooting left handed and it was a little adjusting for him as his right side isn't all the way back.  Just by nature he kept trying to pull his right hand up so I encouraged that!  After about 12 minutes I told him ok, lets sit and take a break!  He really seemed to enjoy playing some ball!

While were sitting on the porch taking a break and drinking some ice tea, I got to experience his relaxed conversations....he told me about feeling down but that he was going to be ok and that he was coming back.  He told me it had been a while since he had chocolate cake and that he wants to go to college next year.  The sky is the limit!  I bought him his cake today!

Captive

   

If you are in the mood for a movie that will captivate you from the beginning then this is it. I can't imagine being in a place where I have lost everything over an addiction.  By everything I mean everything - your husband, your child, your home.  Having to start over, but not wanting to give up that which got you to the point of having to start over.  As she picks up the pieces to try and start over, and is taken captive - only then does her life truly change.  This movie reminded me that we all have purpose, even if we can't clearly see what that purpose might be now.  It reminds me of times we find our self in situations we don't necessarily want to be in, but yet find some wisdom or grow because of that experience. Knowing that this movie was based on a true story, made it that much more eye opening.  It was neat to see how what she thought was trash, ended up being something she would read to her captor that might have softened his heart.

Overview:
Based on a miraculous story about the power of faith, Captive is an "amazing, inspiring" drama about the spiritual collision of two lost souls, Brian Nichols (Golden Globe Nominee David Oyelowo), on the run from police and desperate to make contact with his newborn son, takes recently widowed mother Ashley Smith (Kate Mara) hostage in her own apartment. Fearing for her life and desperately hoping to see her daughter again, she turns to Rick Warren's The Purpose Driven Life for guidance. Ashley and her captor face a crossroads where they discover hope and light in the midst of despair in the moving film that Dick Rolfe, CEO, Dove Foundation hailed as "powerful."

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